With emotions strong and blinding, I decided to withdraw into the eye of the storm, away from the swirling mix of feelings around me. I kept my mouth shut all day long, which enabled me to hear myself scream inside my head until there was nothing left to say to me, but everything left to think about.
And in this space of not talking and keeping myself away from the source of my rage, I was able to quell the noise in me. Slowly, I even started to enjoy my own company—something I hadn’t expected. The distance also helped me think through scenarios I would otherwise have dismissed or overlooked, because there’s just too much distraction that could keep me from what should be given attention.
I thought of extending the disconnection for another day. But the silence started to be overbearing, and I think that a day of solitude, away from my usual self, was enough to bring out what’s truly important. It felt like a clearing; something had been quietly wrung out of me, without force.
And so I slowly returned to my usual self. But this time, I am no longer controlled by emotions. Rather, I’ve reined them in, and now it’s clear to me what I should do next. Not because the situation changed but because I did.
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